My Crazy Life With Bipolar Disorder And Drama

As a child I went through hell. At five years old my dad had killed himself and eight months after that I was sexually assualted on the school playground during school. Then soon after that things started to change for me and not in a good way. In fact it all went down hill from there. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and I was being bullied at school. Kids would spit on me and throw rocks at me and I was so scared that I didnt tell anyone, the teachers had never protected me before, why would they start protecting me? I bassically cowered in silence until my bipolar disorder took a turn for the worst. I would act out during class,  I would even fake being sick so I could get out of going to school. It was safe at home. This went on for another four years. As I entered fifth grade I found that my mom had finally decided to find the correct medication no matter what and she did. Things were starting to get better but I was still being bullied. Then I found that I didnt care about what they said to me, I was an amazing person and I knew that........  to be continued

Bullying in the Eye of The Victims Part 9 : A Childs Pain

This is the story of a young girl that i know and I am going to share it with you. This girl is onlly 9 years old and she is having problems with bullying:
"I have been in school for a couple of months and my best friend, well the girl i thought was my best friend she told me that i should do her homework and then we can sit together at lunch. I did her homework for her a couple of times and she wouldnt let me sit with her. I kept on doing it for a while and then one day i decided to make her fail the assignment on purpose. She got angry and told me that she would never sit with me again and i took a minute and i thought about it becuase she asked me to think about what i had done. Then I walked over to where she was sitting one day at lunch and i looked at her and i said this. "You made me do your homework, and at first i wanted to do it for you becuase you were my friend, but friends are not supposed to use their friends for homework workers, you never sat with me anyways so I am not losing anything by making you fail your homework. YOu used to be my friend, but now your not and i dont really care about it."" This is what the little girl started with, and then she continued. This is also word for word, this is not just my writting.
"I have tried a lot of times to try not to think about her, but i couldnt help but miss the friend that i knew. She used to be great but then she was mean to me. After that day kids started to pick on me and even my so called friend picked on me. It got so bad that I would cry every day that i went home. There were days when i thought about why is should be on the earth. It scares me now becuase i cant believe that i let it get to me that badly. I thought it was bad, but it was only getting worse becuase i let it. Now days, I have a lot of my friends back, but i do not have that one friend that hurt me and made me do her homework. She doesnt deserve to be my friend." Thats how the little girl finnished, and when this certain thing happened, i found out that she was only six at the time, so its three years later and things have gotten better for her. Of course she said that she worried that she would get picked on again. Thats a fear that every kid who is bullied holds onto for the rest of their life. Bullying does hurt people and it can change their life forever if they are bullied in an extremely hurtful way.

Bullying in the Eye of the Victims Part 8 : Sticks, Stones, Broken bones, or is it broken hearts

Sticks and Stones May Break My Bones but Words Will Never Hurt Me

That saying is one of the most untrue statements i have ever heard someone say. People do not realise how badly words can hurt someone, and sometimes words can hurt worse than sticks and stones. Just becuase you have heard rumors about a person, it doesnt make them true. Most of the time they are NEVER true.

Never Say Never

That is another statement that i have a problem with. If you never say never, then you can never really express how much you want something NOT to happen. A person who is bullied cannot tell the bully never to insult them again becuase it hurts them. Never is used thousands of times a day, and it is one of the most important discribing words. I cant stand it when people tell you to never say never becuase they just said never twice and then they say that its different, they were just telling someone not to use the word.

Dont Judge a Book by It's Cover

Now, that is a statement that rings true, and i love it. The problem is, the first two statement's that i talked about are spoken a lot more than that last TRUE statement. Thats the way the world works though, every day there are more false statements spoken than true statements. People use false statements to hurt people a lot. Kids and Teens today, use this method to harm a person emotionally and sometimes physically. That is called bullying. If you really think about it. The route of bullying is a single lie. Its hard to believe it, but in my eyes, its true. Just think about it.

Part 7 : Bullying in the Eye of the Victims : The Savior

Something slipped my mind while I was writting my blog. It was and still is one of the biggest things that helps me get through the day. I am talking about God. He brought me out of a very dark place, even though he did it through a different person, he still did it. He was always there for me even when I didnt believe it. Even when I begged for him to end my pain, even when my dad was taken from me, even when I thought that I couldnt handle any more stress and heartbreak, something made me know deep down that it was going to be ok, and after i started to go back to church i realised that it was god who cared enough for me to tell me that everything will turn out alright. It's hard to survive in the world, becuase its so harsh and cruel. I learned that at a very young age, and the majority of the people who are my age havent even figured it out yet. There were times when i just wanted everything to end. I just wanted it to stop, and I stopped myself from doing anything. I knew that it had to be god stopping me. Today, i have to thank him for stopping me, and helping me, he saved my life. I realize now that if i were to have done something stupid, I would have regretted it. I just wish that my dad would have been there to stop me from doing something, but if he was there, then I wouldnt feel the pain that cuased me to think of doing stupid things, and i wouldnt feel the pain becuase my dad dying was what cuased it.

Part 6 : Bullying in the Eye of the Victims : What is the Color of Bullying

To some people, this might seem silly, but if you really think about it, years ago, it mattered to many people in America, if you were white and if you were black, and they characterised the person by their color. In my opinion i think that people should characterise bullying as a color, and thats becuase it has kind of become a type of person. Bullies are called that becuase they act so cruel and rude to other people, but what many people dont realise is that bullies are victims as well. You may disagree with me, but just think about it, how could a person be so low to try to bring another person down to their level. That is what they do, and after that, they do whatever they can to keep them at that level, then they realise that if they are insluting that person, they are bassically insulting themselves. Cuase they had brought that person to THEIR level, and then they start to bring that person down lower than them, and in some cases, it brings that person so low, that they dont see any worth in their lives, and they kill themselves, or try to. Bullying leads to people killing themselves in to many cases, and sometimes, it leads to other things that involve people hurting themselves. Killing themselves and cutting themselves can usually lead to blood shed, and blood is red. That's why, in my opinion, the color of bullying should be red. So when i talk to my friends about bullying, i say, oh their just in a red place, and when my friends ask me what i mean by that, i tell them what i just told you.

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To be continued.......

Part 5: Bullying in the Eye of the Victims: The End of a Beginning

Well, that's my story, for now, but it's not my ending. Great Story Right? What kind of story is that? All stories have an ending. Well, mine hasnt ended yet, and my blogs not over yet, becuase I have only told you my, STORY. Every story, every book, has a table of contents, a sumary, an index, and all i have really told you is, what i believe is called, "About the Author" So, i'm not done yet, i have only just begun. My Name is Katie Cross, I am the Author, and you know my story, NOW I am going to tell you everything there is to know about Bullying in the Eye of the Victims. Every once in a while I will tell you about things people have said to me, and i will refer to my life experiences

Part 4: Bullying in the Eye of the Victims: The Thoughts That Matter and the Ones that Don't Matter as Much

My life has always seemed different,but now, i just finnished the beginning of my new school. Still in the small area, but now I dont really care. I went to Niceville Florida Last Summer, and thats where my mom considers home, and now, its where i consider home. Theres the gulf of mexico, and beautiful beaches, and there is my moms friend Carrie, and Carrie's duaghter Ronnie, and i just miss it there. I want to work at Universal Studios in Orlando , and i want to be what is called the Head of Marketing. That job consists of designing packaging, buildings, and it consists of being an artist, and my moms other friend has that job and she got us into the Wizarding World of Harry Potter, and the rest of Universal Studios, for free, and i got to see what she got to do for a living, and i wanted to be part of that. It was so cool, and i just knew that that was what i wanted to do when i grew up. When I am thinking about these kind of things, I completely forget about all of those people who bullied me constantly, and it is the best place for me. That's why i want to move to Niceville, closer to Universal, and i cant help but think that i am meant to go and live in Niceville. I miss it there. It was an excape from all of the crap i have gone through. I just want to stop thinking about everything, but then i see my best friend, and I cant help but not want to go. He reminds me that i do have people who care about me here, and it's where all of my family is. I want to leave, but i also dont. Then, i remember that, sometimes you have to leave things behind to do what's best for you. Right now, I have a couple of years till I need to make that decision, so even though i think about my carreer choice a lot, I dont really need to take action just yet. Planning your life ahead of time is a very responsible thing to do, but its also like dwelling in the past, it keeps your mind away from whats happening in the present, what's happening now, what's really important to you now, even though you might not think that it is.